dishusbandmata

Last week, we got a little history lesson on the term ‘Making Love’. We found out that it originally meant “paying attention to someone romantically”. Today, I want to talk to us about the part of this most of us ignore, forget or don't even realise exist. And that’s the side of assumption . To woo, flirt or romance someone might mean so very different things to people, depending on their motives. So many times we (especially us ladies), jump to conclusions just because someone approached us in a certain manner. “He gave me a lift home, so we must be dating now”. Yes I know that’s extreme, but I know ladies who think this way.  We stake claims to people we have no business with, just because we assumed the motive behind their actions. I have a friend who was sure of her “relationship” with a guy that when he eventually introduced us to his girlfriend, my friend couldn't even feign civility! I remember us girls sitting down to really bash this guy out (because h

Erm… where do I start? In preparing to write this article, I’ve had to do some reflecting and deep thinking. Make Love.  The phrase alone gives the impression that love can be made.  Since this is an English phrase, I googled a bit and realised that ‘Making love’ has only recently come to mean ‘having sex’.  Originally it meant to woo, or flirt or romance.  The term originates from the French phrase ‘ faire l'amour’ , which means paying attention to someone romantically .  From a female point of view, this makes complete sense! Sorry about the history lesson.  My marriage is very young so I am still comparing my fantasies while single, to my current reality.  In fantasy world (the few times I actually allowed my mind to wander), I always imagined what making love would really be like.  Yes, it should involve sex, but my thoughts didn’t focus on the act, but the wonderful hunk who would create this amazing experience with me.  Reality has shown that while I have my Hunk, his

During my undergraduate days ,I had a flatmate who was a deeply spiritual sister whose godliness also was taken on the outward appearance with the elimination of jewelry and all forms of make -up. She was also engaged to a brother of the same denomination. So I was very surprised one day when I saw her with a book titled “ Sex begins in the kitchen ”.It was a very intriguing title and she assured me that it was an interesting book. I gave her the money to purchase a copy for me also byt when she returned from the market ,she searched frantically for the book which she claimed she purchased but could no longer find. I could not afford another copy and ended up not reading the book until several years later. But as the years have passed by and I have read several books on relationships, most of the authors seem to agree that the issue of sex is not an isolated event for a woman. Rather its success would be dependent  on several other factors along the way and in her day that cou

Having a topic to write on in theory can sometimes be challenging and so I had mentally taken myself off from contributing on the topic  for this month ”Love making” until the writer scheduled was unable to meet the deadline ,leaving me with the arduous responsibility of filling in the gap….Happy Reading … While growing up, I was an avid and a very fast reader. In my early days in the secondary(high) school, I read all the possible books of Pacesetters series  I could lay hold on(surprisingly you can still get them now). If you are from my  generation, you may remember “ Evbu my love ”,  “ Rich Girl, Poor boy”, “ Naira Power”, " Agony in her voice ", " The Cyclist " , The Betrayer ", ” The Black Temple ”, " Death is a woman ”, “ The Equatorial Assignment " ,“ The Undesirable Element,” and so many  more. I remember reading about the main female character : Bintu  in “ The Undesirable Element ” following the Alhaji and the next thing, she wa